We are down to 37 days till departure for Japan! Time has just been flying by and I feel like I have so much to do before I leave. I need to get some frames (already got a years supply of contacts), get my last cavity filled in my teeth, get a suitcase, manage money until I leave. Not to mention my car died just one month before departure, so I had to get a battery!
Nonetheless, everything is falling into place right before I leave. I was approved for my student visa just today and it’s on its way here! I have a feeling once I’m actually in Japan I won’t want to leave again due to all the work it takes just to get there! Paperwork, savings, etc.
I’m beyond excited though. The feelings I have now are those of anticipation, excitement, exploration, and restlessness. This whole experience is so surreal right now. I haven’t even left and I’m already trying to think of ways I can stay if I don’t want to leave. I’m getting way too ahead of myself. I think that’s ok though. I’ve worked super hard to reach this point in my life, and I’m just letting the waves crash over me and I’m rolling with the punches. I do get sad here and there knowing that if I have a bad dream, or there’s a thunderstorm I can’t bury myself in my husband’s chest. However, we are so strong together and even stronger apart. I know we will both change and grow into amazing people while we are apart from each other, and have lots of stories to tell when we reunite. And “Fear is for jerks.”
Something I’ve been watching recently is Jim Carrey’s Commencement Speech at Maharishi University of Management. I listen to this when I have doubts about wanting to do art, or move across the world to study, live, and work. I draw strength from what he has to say. And even if everyone is looking at me and asking questions or shaking their heads, I know what I’m doing makes me happy, and that’s all that matters.
I guess it doesn’t yet seem like a big deal to me. I feel like if anyone works hard and surrounds themselves with love and asks the universe for something, it will come to them.
Never in my life have I gotten something so big from putting myself out there and working hard than the Gilman Scholarship, my Individualized Degree, and this Study Abroad trip. It’s amazing what happens when you take risks and dare to try something. There’s nothing special about me, or anyone really, we can all work hard and accomplish big things. I hope if you’re reading this blog, you dare to try something new. You just have to do it, and not listen to your brain. (Well, maybe a little). This quote from Jim Carrey has stayed with me:
“As far as I can tell, it’s just about letting the universe know what you want and working toward it while letting go of how it comes to pass. Your job is not to figure out how it’s going to happen for you. But to open the door in your head, and when the door opens in real life, just walk through it. And don’t worry if you miss your queue, because there are always doors opening. They keep opening.”
I am interested in photography, fashion, art and language. I want to do something in those fields. I am full of thankfulness and just full of love toward the Gilman Scholarship. This trip would not be possible without it, I truly know that. I am so grateful, and hope I can pay it forward through video, blog posts, and encouragement to those like me who come from poor backgrounds.
I don’t know what will happen during, or after this trip. But come on already! I’m ready to find out!